Taking Care of Yourself: Borrowed Songs

Happy Thursday, Positive Animal Caregivers! ♡🐾

This past week, I started catsitting for the first time. Mango and Mochi are a little less demanding than the dogs I usually care for, which means I’ve had the rare luxury of simply sitting beside them and staring out the window. The quiet has given me space for a few mental breaks — something that’s easy to forget in the middle of a busy caregiving day.

How about you? Have you had a chance to take a short break lately?

For the next few minutes, take a breather.  This time is yours. Not the animals’. Not the clients’. Just yours.

Animal caregiving is full of peaks and valleys. Last week, every one of you who voted shared that you were feeling positive. Stefanie even brightened my day by writing: “Watching my three kitties eat breakfast this morning brought a smile to my eyes.”

Let’s pause and check in —

Add a note if you want (I read them all)

Every animal caregiver has a special project. 

Maybe it’s that reactive cat who hisses at the shadow of every human being. Or that easily stimulated dog who pounces at the faintest sniff of another pooch from a mile away. Mine was a timid dog named Dolly, who sat at the back of her kennel by herself, quietly wishing no human would ever enter her world.

Around that time, I binge-watched Rocky Kanaka — famous, at least among dog rescuers — for his YouTube videos of sitting patiently with shelter dogs and helping shut-down animals come around. I was convinced I could do the same. It all looked straightforward: sit quietly nearby, offer treats, and wait for the dog to come around and offer kisses.

Boiled chicken in hand — a rare luxury in the Korean shelter where I volunteered — I tried winning Dolly over. We took small steps: she would take the meat from my hand. But unlike Kanaka’s videos, she slipped right back into herself once the treats were gone. She never quite opened up or seemed to enjoy my presence (the chicken alone would have been preferable). Week after week, I left her kennel feeling a little discouraged.

This week, I was reminded that animal training is rarely a straight line. 

The regent honeyeater — a black-and-yellow songbird from southern Australia — breeds only when males sing the correct love song. But as their population fell to fewer than 250 birds, scientists discovered something alarming: the younger males no longer knew the right tune. With so few adults left, juveniles had no elders to learn from. Instead, they copied the songs of other bird species — songs that female regent honeyeaters ignore.

Since 2020, scientists have taken on an unusual project: regent honeyeater karaoke. First, they played recordings of the wild song to young zoo-bred birds every day for six months. None of them learned it. The next season, they tried live teachers — bringing wild-born birds into the zoo to demonstrate the songs. But real progress only came a year later, when they reduced the “class size” to six birds. The breakthrough: 42% of juveniles learned the correct song.

“The full version of the wild song taught to zoo-bred males disappeared from the wild during the study,” remarked the researchers in their report, “making the zoo population the only remaining source of traditional song culture.” Reading that line, I could feel the researchers’ quiet pride. They had simply kept going — adjusting their approach until something finally worked. 

My special project with Dolly ended two years ago when I left the country. Unlike the YouTube videos, I never had that quiet moment where her head rested against me and she let me stroke her calmly. At times, I felt defeated. Reading about the honeyeater project, I imagined the scientists felt something similar. Progress with animals rarely arrives in neat, dramatic moments. It comes through patience, small experiments, and the willingness to keep showing up — even when things aren’t working as expected.

Dolly never became my success story. But maybe, like those birds learning their songs one lesson at a time, every quiet visit to her kennel still counted for something.

The percentage of pet owners who either train their dogs themselves or do not use any formal training at all.

Add a note if you want (I read them all)

Mark your calendars for these upcoming opportunities to connect with others:

Here are the ways to recharge this week. Pick ONE small thing that makes you smile. You’ve earned it. 

Listen: Vet nurse Hannah recommends the song “Vienna" by Billy Joel. She said: "A lot of the time when I am feeling down it is related to imposter syndrome, not feeling like I’m doing enough or feeling like I’m not as successful as my peers. This song is a beautiful reminder that we are all on our own timelines, and that you physically cannot do everything at the same time!"

Reply to share a song that lifts you up. 

Watch: Relax with The Bird Song, a short film about a mother, a son, and an urengkonthou — the white-breasted waterhen commonly found in India. 

Write: Start a gratitude journal. This week’s prompt: What I learned from my special project. 

Appreciate: Set a five-minute timer and sit with a beautiful piece of art. This week’s artwork: View from My Window.

Try: Take three, intentional breaths the next time you stop at a red light.

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Thanks for spending part of your day with me and the rest of the Positive Animal Caregivers Club. Take care of yourself this week. Remember - even superheroes need naps. 

– Philip